99+ Terry Pratchett Quotes on Diggers, Humor and Death - Quotes.pub

Here you will find all the famous Terry Pratchett quotes. There are more than 99+ quotes in our Terry Pratchett quotes collection. We have collected all of them and made stunning Terry Pratchett wallpapers & posters out of those quotes. You can use this wallpapers & posters on mobile, desktop, print and frame them or share them on the various social media platforms. You can download the quotes images in various different sizes for free. In the below list you can find quotes in various categories like Diggers, Humor and Death

Even when he was small there’d been a part of him that thought the temple was a silly boring place, and tried to make him laugh when he was supposed to be listening to sermons. It had grown up with him. It was the Oats that read avidly and always remembered those passages which cast doubt on the literal truth of the Book of Om—and nudged him and said, if this isn’t true, what can you believe?And the other half of him would say: there must be other kinds of truth.And he’d reply: other kinds than the kind that is actually true, you mean?And he’d say: define actually!And he’d shout: well, actually Omnians would have tortured you to death, not long ago, for even thinking like this. Remember that? Remember how many died for using the brain which, you seem to think, their god gave them? What kind of truth excuses all that pain?He’d never quite worked out how to put the answer into words. And then the headaches would start, and the sleepless nights. The Church schismed all the time these days, and this was surely the ultimate one, starting a war inside one’s head.

Carpe Jugulum Quotes

Sometimes you laugh because you're alive when you really shouldn't be.

Nation Quotes

We know all about you, Rincewind the magician. You are a man of great cunning and artifice. You laugh in the face of Death. Your affected air of craven cowardice does not fool me.” It fooled Rincewind.

The Color of Magic Quotes

she said, on general principles.

Wyrd Sisters Quotes

in a cottage deep in the forest lived the wicked old witch...it was a cottage out of the nastier kind of fairy tale

A Hat Full of Sky Quotes

The walls were covered with graffiti and William passed the time correcting the spelling

It didn't have a name. Animals don't normally bother with them.

Animals Quotes Name Quotes Soul Music Quotes

The High Priest at the Temple of Blind Io was going to be a problem. Cutwell had marked himdown as a dear old soul whose expertise with the knife was so unreliable that half of thesacrifices got tired of waiting and wandered away. The last time he'd tried to sacrifice a goat ithad time to give birth to twins before he could focus, and then the courage of motherhood hadresulted in it chasing the entire priesthood out of the temple.

Mort Quotes

we are history! everything we've ever been on the way to becoming us, we still are.

A Hat Full of Sky Quotes

I’VE NEVER BEEN VERY SURE ABOUT WHAT IS RIGHT, said Bill Door. I AM NOT SURE THERE IS SUCH A THING AS RIGHT. OR WRONG. JUST PLACES TO STAND.

Reaper Man Quotes

Granny Weatherwax was stretched rigid on her bed. Her face was gray, her skin was cold. People had discovered her like this before, and it always caused embarrassment. So now she reassured visitors but tempted fate by always holding, in her rigid hands, a small handwritten sign which read: I ATE’NT DEAD.

Lords and Ladies Quotes

Somehow the events set the seal on the day. It became a broken crockery day, a day of people getting under each other’s feet and being peevish. Esk’s mother dropped a jug that had belonged to her grandmother

Equal Rites Quotes

The important thing about having lots of things to remember is that you’ve got to go somewhere afterward where you can remember them, you see? You’ve got to stop. You haven’t really been anywhere until you’ve got back home. I think that’s what I mean.

The Light Fantastic Quotes

Wizards don’t like philosophy very much. As far as they are concerned, one hand clapping makes a noise like “cl.

He simply went from vertical to horizontal in one marvelous geometric sweep.

Galder Weatherwax, Supreme Grand Conjuror of the Order of the Silver Star, Lord Imperial of the Sacred Staff, Eighth Level Ipsissimus and 304th Chancellor of Unseen University, wasn’t simply an impressive sight even in his red nightshirt with the hand-embroidered mystic runes, even in his long cap with the bobble on, even with the Wee Willie Winkie candlestick in his hand. He even managed to very nearly pull it off in fluffy pompom slippers as

The Light Fantastic Quotes

The trouble with his daughter, though, was not ordinary naughtiness but the infuriating way she had of relentlessly pursuing the thread of an argument long after she should have put it down. It always flustered him. She

Equal Rites Quotes

The Librarian looked at his charges approvingly, made his last rounds of the slumbering shelves, and then dragged his blanket underneath his desk, ate a goodnight banana, and fell asleep.

Sourcery Quotes

Three Pink Pig and Five White Fang were, loosely speaking, privates, and not just because they were pale, vulnerable, and inclined to curl up and hide when danger threatened.

Humor Quotes Interesting Times Quotes

most people don’t set foot outside their own heads much.

Equal Rites Quotes

Quezovercoatl squirmed. The King swiveled the throne back and forth a bit. “Now, I want you to go straight back down there and tell them you’re sorry,” he said. “Pardon?” “Tell them you’ve changed your mind. Tell them that what you really wanted them to do was strive day and night to improve the lot of their fellow men. It’ll be a winner.

Eric Quotes

Le sang nouveau est arrivé,” said Vlad.“Carpe diem,” said the Count.“By the throat,” said the Countess.

Carpe Jugulum Quotes

Pero nunca estás en un cuento cuando te hace falta.

Un sombrero de cielo Quotes

But magic has a habit of lying low, like a rake in the grass. Winter

Equal Rites Quotes

Some jobs offer increments. This one offered... well, quite the reverse

It was the King Color, of which all the lesser colors are merely partial and wishy-washy reflections. It was octarine, the color of magic. It was alive and glowing and vibrant and it was the undisputed pigment of the imagination, because wherever it appeared it was a sign that mere matter was a servant of the powers of the magical mind. It was enchantment itself.

The Color of Magic Quotes

You’re not powerful enough to do anything like that,” said Tiffany. “You know, you are right,” said the Queen. “That kind of physical magic is, indeed, very hard. But I can make you think I’ve done the most . . . terrible things. And that, little girl, is all I need to do. Would you like to beg for mercy now? You may not be able to later.

The Wee Free Men Quotes

Perhaps they saw what their minds were instructed to see, because the human brain is not equipped to see War, Famine, Pollution, and Death when they don’t want to be seen, and has got so good at not seeing that it often manages not to see them even when they abound on every side.

Good omens Quotes

And, as is generally the case around the time a prophet is expected, the Church redoubled its efforts to be holy. This was very much like the bustle you get in any large concern when the auditors are expected, but tended towards taking people suspected of being less holy and putting them to death in a hundred ingenious ways. This is considered a reliable barometer of the state of one’s piety in most of the really popular religions.

Small Gods: (Discworld Novel 13) Quotes

but surely she could be excused just a tiny touch of nasty in the privacy of her own head?

I Shall Wear Midnight Quotes

..... he had ridden right through the gates of the palace. Of course, people rode throughthe gates of the palace every day, but most of them needed the things to be opened first.The guards on the other side were rigid with fear, because they thought they had seen a ghost.They would have been far more frightened if they had known that a ghost was almost exactlywhat they hadn't seen.The guard outside the doors of the great hall had seen it happen too, but he had time to gather hiswits, or such that remained, and raise his spear as Binky trotted across the courtyard.'Halt,' he croaked. 'Halt. What goes where?'Mort saw him for the first time.'What?' he said, still lost in thought.The guard ran his tongue over his dry lips, and backed away. Mort slid off Binky's back andwalked forward.'I meant, what goes there?' the guard tried again, with a mixture of doggedness and suicidalstupidity that marked him for early promotion.Mort caught the spear gently and lifted it out of the way of the door. As he did so the torchlightilluminated his face.'Mort,' he said softly.It should have been enough for any normal soldier, but this guard was officer material.'I mean, friend or foe?' he stuttered, trying to avoid Mort's gaze.'Which would you prefer?' he grinned. It wasn't quite the grin of his master, but it was a prettyeffective grin and didn't have a trace of humour in it.The guard sagged with relief, and stood aside.'Pass, friend,' he said.

Mort Quotes

The air smelled of a limited life expectancy. A

Men at Arms Quotes

What is it?' asked Rincewind.'Oh, just the picture you took in the temple.'Rincewind looked in horror. There, bordered by a few glimpses of tentacle, was a huge, whorled, callused, potion-stained and unfocused thumb.'That's the story of my life,' he said wearily.

The Color of Magic Quotes

Let’s just run through this again, shall we?” said the Demon King. He leaned back in his throne. “You happened to find the Tezumen one day and decided, I think I recall your words correctly, that they were ‘a bunch of Stone-Age no-hopers sitting around in a swamp being no trouble to anyone,’ am I right? Whereupon you entered the mind of one of their high priests—I believe at that time they worshipped a small stick—drove him insane and inspired the tribes to unite, terrorize their neighbors and bring forth upon the continent a new nation dedicated to the proposition that all men should be taken to the top of ceremonial pyramids and be chopped up with stone knives.” The King pulled his notes toward him. “Oh yes, some of them were also to be flayed alive,” he added. Quezovercoatl shuffled his feet. “Whereupon,” said the King, “they immediately engaged in a prolonged war with just about everyone else, bringing death and destruction to thousands of moderately blameless people, ekcetra, ekcetra. Now, look, this sort of thing has got to stop.” Quezovercoatl swayed back a bit. “It was only, you know, a hobby,” said the imp. “I thought, you know, it was the right thing, sort of thing. Death and destruction and that.” “You did, did you?” said the King. “Thousands of more-or-less innocent people dying? Straight out of our hands,” he snapped his fingers, “just like that. Straight off to their happy hunting ground or whatever. That’s the trouble with you people. You don’t think of the Big Picture. I mean, look at the Tezumen. Gloomy, unimaginative, obsessive…by now they could have invented a whole bureaucracy and taxation system that could have turned the minds of the continent to slag. Instead of which, they’re just a bunch of second-rate axe-murderers. What a waste.

Eric Quotes

And there were all the stars, looking remarkably like powdered diamonds spilled on black velvet, the stars that lured and ultimately called the boldest toward them… The

The Color of Magic Quotes

And there were all the stars, looking remarkably like powdered diamonds spilled on black velvet, the stars that lured and ultimately called the boldest

The Color of Magic Quotes

...Human beings, little bags of thinking water held up briefly by fragile accumulations of calcium...

Bags Quotes Calcium Quotes Human Quotes Water Quotes

Poets have tried to describe Ankh-Morpork. They have failed. Perhaps it’s the sheer zestful vitality of the place, or maybe it’s just that a city with a million inhabitants and no sewers is rather robust for poets, who prefer daffodils and no wonder. So let’s just say that Ankh-Morpork is as full of life as an old cheese on a hot day, as loud as a curse in a cathedral, as bright as an oil slick, as colorful as a bruise and as full of activity, industry, bustle and sheer exuberant busyness as a dead dog on a termite mound.

Mort Quotes

hat. A wizard without a hat was just a sad man with a suspicious taste in clothes. A wizard without a hat wasn’t anyone.

The Last Continent Quotes

Oh, all right! But this doesn’t mean we’re bonding!” “Fine. Fine.” “I’m not a bondage kind of person,” Angua added. “Yes, yes,” said Sally. “I can see that.

Thud! Quotes

Hey, kitty. So you found the nest?

The Long Utopia Quotes

Y a veces la decisión no era entre algo bueno y algo malo, sino entre dos cosas malas: no había una opción correcta, solo… opciones.

Me vestiré de medianoche Quotes

I want to know why. Why everything. I don't know the answers, but a few days ago I didn't know there were questions.

Inspirational quotes Quotes

is empty, and all the devils are here.

Good omens Quotes

There are billions of gods in the world. They swarm as thick as herring roe. Most of them are too small to see and never get worshipped, at least by anything bigger than bacteria, who never say their prayers and don't demand much in the way of miracles.

Small Gods Quotes

Like many people of limited intellectual scope, Snouty did take what he could do very seriously.

Night Watch Quotes Pratchett Quotes Snouty Quotes

He always suspected the poetic description of Time like an ever-rolling stream. Time, in his experience, moved more like rocks … sliding, pressing, building up force underground and then, with one jerk that shakes the crockery, a whole field of turnips mysteriously slips sideways by six feet.

The Fifth Elephant Quotes

You got no soul, Cap’n,” he said. “When a stranger comes into the city under the thrall of the dragon and challenges it with a glittery sword, weeell, there’s only one outcome, ain’t there? It’s probably destiny.

Guards! Guards! Quotes

So many places I’ve never been to . . . I have a whole world to experience before it’s too late, and I’m keeping a journal of it all as I go, so I’ll be able to enjoy the world all over again when I get back.

Raising Steam Quotes

Nevertheless, the human brain, which survives by hoping from one second to another, will always endeavor to put off the moment of truth. Moist

Making Money Quotes