99+ Robert Orben Quotes on Startup and Volunteer - Quotes.pub

Here you will find all the famous Robert Orben quotes. There are more than 99+ quotes in our Robert Orben quotes collection. We have collected all of them and made stunning Robert Orben wallpapers & posters out of those quotes. You can use this wallpapers & posters on mobile, desktop, print and frame them or share them on the various social media platforms. You can download the quotes images in various different sizes for free. In the below list you can find quotes in various categories like Startup and Volunteer

I had a terrible fight with my wife on New Year’s Eve. She called me a procrastinator. So I finished addressing the Christmas cards and left.

New year Quotes

I take my children everywhere. Unfortunately, they find a way home.

More than ever before, Americans are suffering from back problems: back taxes, back rent, back auto payments.

Wall Street is where prophets tell us what will happen and profits tell us what did happen.

What bothers me about TV is that it tends to take our minds off our minds.

Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals.

Very few people ever meet celebrities. All we really know is what we read about them and the most memorable lines are jokes. That’s how we tend to define what we think of a public figure.

Do you realize that in the past sixty years, the only foreigners the French have been able to drive out are American tourists?

The chance to be seen as a warm, witty guy is too good an opportunity for a politician to miss.

Sociologists say that going to the movies is a bonding experience. It probably has to do with the way you feet stick to the floor.

Anybody with a good sense of humor is one-up on their competition. We respond to somebody who has the ability to make us laugh. It’s a bonding influence.

I value people with a conscience. It’s like a beeper from God.

What if the meek inherited the Earth and we had to defend ourselves from Martians?

I’d be surprised if Ronald Reagan doesn’t run again. To us it’s a second term. To him it’s a double feature.

These detective series on TV always end at precisely the right moment-after the criminal is arrested and before the court turns him loose.

New Yorkers are so impersonal, if it wasn’t for muggings there wouldn’t be any contact at all!

Humor starts like a wildfire, but then continues on, smoldering, smoldering for years.

We’re supposed to take our problems to a family adviser. Personally, I’ve never met a family adviser. They’re all off somewhere listening to dirty stories.

President Ford used humor a great deal.

With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they’d bust it to Corporal!

Did you ever figure to be living in a time when your check is good, but the bank bounces?

You wouldn’t want Alan Greenspan to write the instructions for assembling a beach chair.

It’s an awful thing to grow old by yourself. My wife hasn’t had a birthday in seven years.

Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?

Lincoln was known to have walked miles to borrow books, to get the most rudimentary form of education. So what do we do on his birthday? We close the schools!

It’s mandatory in this day and age to be considered to have a sense of humor and to demonstrate it. You’re not paying me for a joke, You’re paying me for the right joke.

If you can get someone to laugh with you, they will be more willing to identify with you, listen to you. It parts the waters.

As much as we admire all the characteristics of a Ronald Reagan, as soon as something goes wrong, people will hate those same characteristics.

Have you noticed when you go on a diet, the first thing you lose is your temper.

The secret of writing comedy is to know where it’s all going, then get ahead of it.

I understand the big food companies are developing a tearless onion. I think they can do it – after all, they’ve already given us tasteless bread.

I remember when humor was gentle pokes. I used to call it ‘arm around the shoulder’ humor. Now they go for the jugular and they take no prisoners. It’s mean, mean stuff.

Economists can certainly disappoint you. One said that the economy would turn up by the last quarter. Well, I’m down to mine and it hasn’t.

Did you ever get to wondering if taxation without representation might have been cheaper?

My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she’s as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.

I feel that if God had really wanted us to have enough oil, he would never have given us a Department of Energy.

Nowadays, you cannot be a very Effective political figure without Having a demonstrable sense of humor. People take to it.

To exercise is human; not to is divine.

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.

Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price.

Did you ever see that painting the Mona Lisa. It always reminds me of a reporter listening to a politician.

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that “individuality” is the key to success.

I’d like to say a few words about one of the most popular concepts in the modern education – show and tell. Show and Tell is a device created by grammar schools to communicate family secrets to 32 other families before 9:15 am in the morning.

The Playboy Calendar this year has some tiptop models. Any more top and they’d tip.

I don’t see why religion and science can’t cooperate. What’s wrong with using a computer to count our blessings?

Do you realize what would happen if Moses were alive today? He’d go up to Mount Sinai, come back with the Ten Commandments, and spend the next eight years trying to get published.

Never raise your hand to your children – it leaves your midsection unprotected.

In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative; fight, flee – or laugh.

Did you hear about the woman who sent out 40,000 Valentine Cards doused in perfume and signed, “Guess Who?” She’s a divorce lawyer.

They say kids today don’t know the value of a dollar. They certainly do know the value of a dollar. That’s why they ask for five.

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